poetry:emotions
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i guess i feel bad for loving her more than i loved you but when i remember loving you it was favors, begging, going out in silence and you screwing up again your company fulfilled me and we had good conversation though it diminishes in this bliss i feel with her … i mistook obsession…
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shadows and small (big) sounds scare me still footsteps in my vicinity i freeze, rapid mind rabbit-hearted learned silence, forced observation masking each jump with the excuse of too much coffee, stress about the house, and whatnot. this line of thinking carries into my relationships, too i’ve an aversion to sleeping when there’s a pending…
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dreamt of you last night the visceral upset in the morning forming in my gut during the work day lunch break i spewed it out in repetitive prose trying to make sense of it the first rainy day of fall and you along with summer have completely faded the morning of i watched the sky’s…
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This autumn has brought upon me a clawing for stability and thawing in uncertainty. It’s like my first day being alive again—forced to feel, but not forged to deal with it. I am as fragile as sculpted stone, feigned soft and sturdy, capable of shattering. I shame myself for lazing around, forgetting that this inability…
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Of course I have my reservations; Why, I am soft spoken—swimmingly (seemingly) golden. It’s all controlled and monitored, For I am violently hurting and desperate to express it, explain why. I think my anger hovers over me like a fly I’m unaware of. Point it out and out of embarrassment, I’ll attempt to cleanse myself…
Pajolo Cam 